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Class of 2017: Facebook Highlights

May 7, 2013

It’s an age-old tradition for upper-classmen to join the incoming first-year groups on Facebook. Here, we give you the highlights of the concerns of the Class of 2017 and the Thrill’s helpful responses*.

We DO know where it is. Ha. (via greenwichmeantime.com)

  • any anarchists out there? – Yes, but you’re only allowed in the northwest corner of campus, next to the Libertarians.
  • My parents met in Pierce. Anybody else a legacy? – Peirce*** (ask your parents…)
  • Any musicians out there? – Nope. None. You’re the only one.
  • Hi guys I have a question and I feel like only my fellow Kenyon mates can answer it. I’m in need for some heavy angry classical music. Like intense. – I feel you, I feel you. Have you checked out the Biebs’s Eenie Meenie? Now that’s a real classic.
  • Does Kenyon have a break-dancing group? – Well, if you count the guy who broke his foot last weekend at Old Kenyon, then yes!
  • There better be good cell reception in Gambier. – Aww, how cute. They don’t even go here yet and they already know some Kenyon jokes.
  • Any NorCal people? – Nah man, I’m from SoMinn, but born and raised WeFla.
  • Hey guys, I’m just curious. Like this post if you know where Myanmar is. – Does it even matter? ‘Cuz we aren’t getting local sausages from there.
  • Me and my bro are coming in hot! We’re going to tear this place up and put Kenyon College parties on the university level. Go Lords! – Newsflash: we already are.

*Remember, we mock you because we love you. Welcome to Kenyon, Class of 2017! We’re glad to have you.

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10 Comments leave one →
  1. Anonymous permalink
    May 7, 2013 3:22 pm

    : (((

  2. Anonymous permalink
    May 7, 2013 3:53 pm

    Beethoven piano sonatas, esp. middle period ones, fill all your heavy angry classical music needs, concerned incoming freshie. Tempest and the first movement of Pathetique are good.

  3. May 7, 2013 4:06 pm

    General answer for the first year looking for angsty classical: anything German and late-Romantic. I’ll work on some specifics for you.

    • May 7, 2013 4:08 pm

      But of course I agree with Anon above about Beethoven. Try his string quartets too.

  4. Dingus permalink
    May 7, 2013 4:36 pm

    I’m sure you guys are trying your best but this post is so unfunny it hurts to read

  5. Anonymous permalink
    May 7, 2013 7:06 pm

    One of my personal favorites is “Who’s ready for orientation?” posted over two months before we get on campus…

  6. Anonymous permalink
    May 7, 2013 7:47 pm

    Rachmaninoff.

  7. B Belt permalink
    May 10, 2013 7:29 pm

    No one calls it NorCal.

    Also, there is not tradition of current students joining the groups, it’s a structural creepiness.

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