While surveying Peirce for your soulmate, you may not think to consider their major as a deciding factor. Consider it.
With the help of Becky Gorin ’14, with me to provide the elusive ginger perspective, I give you Kenyon College’s Top 3 Best and Worst Majors to Date.
Best Majors
1) Music
Sam: I dated a musician once; it was glorious.
Becky: What girl doesn’t want a song written about them?
2) Modern Languages and Literatures (MLL)
Sam: Unless it’s, like, German, foreign languages are always sexy, whether or not you actually understand them at all.
Becky: They can serenade you in at least three languages! Hopefully one will be a Romance language…
3) Econ
Sam: Because someone has to make the money if you’re going to be a Classics major.
Becky: Seconded.
After the jump, the three worst majors to date!
Worst Majors
1) Drama
Sam: It takes a lot of courage to stand up in front of people and perform as someone else. It also takes a large ego.
Becky: You can never tell whether or not they’re just playing a part.
2) Philosophy
Sam: Because you like long walks on the beach conversations about Kant, right?
Becky: I don’t want to be told that I’m just a figment of someone’s imagination (true story).
3) Chemistry
Sam: Because you don’t want to be embarrassed when you date a Chem major and they get a job right out of college and you don’t.
Becky: How often do you see science majors outside of the science quad?
Well, there you have it! We hope we haven’t offended anyone, or alienated any potential soul mates out there.
The Kenyon Thrill 
*~*~*~*~Deutsch ist die schönste Sprache~*~*~*~*
Die schönste!!!
Ja wohl!
Ja! Stimmt!
Holy shitting all over your ex through an unfunny and poorly conceived column concept, Batman!
Yeesh. Just listen to “Someone Like You” and cry it out like the rest of us, Sam!
I feel really cool and good about myself when I trash talk other people anonymously too!
This comment is the best
Here’s a question, what if someone is, say, a double major in Music and Drama? Are they then the best worst person to date or the worst best person to date or just completely average? The Thrill should really be more thorough in its coverage of these very important issues.
and how do minors/concentrations fit into the matrix?
would a philosophy major with a romance language minor be slightly less bad to date than a plain old philosophy major with no language skills whatsoever?
or would it be more of a drawback because then they can tell you that you are merely a figment of their imagination in multiple languages?
very good point, these are important issues that this article simply does not cover. tsk tsk
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