10 o’clock List: Top 10 Weirdest Things About Kenyon Nightlife

Editors’ Note: Because the tenor of the comments section for this post has turned vulgar and hostile, forcing us to moderate a number of them, we have closed comments on this post for the time being.

Look, I’m not saying I’ve never done any of these things, or that there’s anything wrong with them (well, maybe #5), but nights out at Kenyon are a distinct experience that’s hard to describe to those outside the bubble. I’ve tried to capture the true gems of Kenyon nightlife, but it was hard to narrow this list down. In no particular order: The Top 10 Weirdest Things About Kenyon Nightlife.

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1. Ladies’ Night at the Cove. On a Thursday. $1 jello shots. Why am I getting an email about this and how did the Cove get my email?

2. Taking pee breaks in Farr or Peirce on the way to/from a party.

3. Using the Old Kenyon laundry rooms as the coat room and then finding someone’s soggy shirt in your jacket the next day.

4. Wednesdays. Seriously. Since when is that a thing?

5. Muploading pictures of drunk people with cats. Animal abuse?

6. Chilling in the Mather breezeway in pajamas. Guaranteed sight every weekend.

7. Weaver Cottage. Why are we having parties in a place that has a kitchen?

8. Going to parties with townies. That’s totally a thing.

9. Bexley Block Party. Fun? Yes. Takes place in a parking lot? Also yes.

10. Gund Commons parties. It’s weird ’cause there’s a computer lab in the other room. And a ping pong table.

Runner-Up: The table of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches as party favors in Old Kenyon (and who could forget the single-slice Kraft cheese sandwiches?).

42 responses

  1. YO, number 5, fuckin rude. I’m guessing that was a targeted post, and that’s not cool. Kenyon’s too small for that shit.

  2. Why the continued specific attacks? Do we not remember what happened when you suggested that the KAC head house and Mather were “creepy” and that debacle that ensued? Looks like someone hasn’t learned their lesson on what it means to be nice.

    • I find it ironic that you are so apt to point out Lauren’s specific attacks (which are arguably non-existent in this post) when in doing so you are specifically attacking her. Ever think about that one?

  3. this is funny and i like it
    everyone needs to take a chill pill and go to kac sauna and then take a nice jog on the kokosing or the reverse

    stop h8ing and TAKE YOUR DRAMATICS TO SOME ONE WHO CARES. ltcoolbaby is unstoppable and your hurtful comments are much worse than her funny anecdotes. leave her alone and do your hw.

  4. Hey buds, just a little thought here–we live in a great big place that’s filled with something called FREEDOM OF SPEECH so if someone wants to write something…guess what?? THEY CAN WRITE IT. Unless you want to take this bad boy to the Supreme Court for libel, then I suggest you exert your time and energy toward doing something like homework instead of harassing a talented and entertaining writer who is just doing her job. Lauren’s work is funny, fresh, and provocative–everything a college blog should be. I commend her for her work.

  5. Why are all your articles so rude? We get it, Kenyon is not for everyone. It’s quirky, yes. And maybe a little weird, but you go here too. Maybe turn down the hate a bit.

  6. THATS MY ROOMMMATE BITCH HATERS YOU HAVE CHOSE THE WRONG GIRL TO MESS WITH
    LAUREN TOOLE IS A STATE BBALL CHAMP, A VERY GIFTED WRITER, AND AN AWESOME ROOMMATE

    honestly if you think you are going to come after her again–you are one sorry asshole
    do not mess
    I WILL FIND YOU . and it will be “a specific attack”

    you are too old for this whoever you are. act your age not your shoesize—as you so aptly put “this is a small campus” and it is way too small to be addressing someone so harshly in a public domain for no reason.

    fuck you in advance

    sydney jill watnick
    kenyon ’14

    (do not fuck with the women of the bush)
    pps. kkg lives

    • unless you are drunk and the cats don’t want you to fucking mess with them, which they don’t. leave the cats alone. quit your bitching.

  7. that last comment—are you drunk cuz i dont think that is coherent english

    taking pictures with stray cats is sketchy but also quintessentially kenyon. which i think is lauren tooles point in this post. i know myself that lauren loves cats and has one of her own. the cat hater who lives in bushnell 204 is myself. if you want to hate on someone for hating on cats back off my roommate.
    i am a proud hater of cats.

  8. LAUREN TOOLE IS THE BEST!!! She is so smart and she’s just being funny. Haters gon’ h8, but she gon’ be witty 4eva.

  9. i AM SOOOOO MAD that YOUUUUUUUUUUU
    YOU YOU YOU YOU YOU YOUUUUU are WASTING TIIIIIME
    commenting MEAN THIngS TO A NICE PERSON WHO IS JUST TRYING TO MAKE YOU SMILE ON A TUESDAY NIGHT
    ;)

    YOU TROLLLZ YOU YOU YOU TROLLZ

    yah fuck catz

    smoke more ganja

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