Good morning! Here are some stories to mention to your parents on the phone, so they don’t think you’re living in an alternate universe.

The Lead Story: The Taliban launched an attack on American and European embassies on Saturday in Kabul, Afghanistan, leaving at least 35 dead. The Taliban is calling the attack part of a “spring offensive.”

(via Wikimedia Commons)

Everything Else:

While it’s no secret that big donors often get special perks, apparently they’ve been bringing lobbyists on their trips to the White House.

The Titanic sank 100 years ago yesterday.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are getting married. Finally, we can all rest easy.

In Video:

In news that broke my heart, a brave black labrador stood by her companion, who had been fatally hit by a car, in the middle of traffic in La Puente, Calif. (Warning: graphic)

A group of New Yorkers made a spoof of “N***as in Paris about books. It’s fantastic.

Finally, the best SNL sketch in a long time.

The Long Read: A profile of Kanye West in The Atlantic Monthly, titled “American Mozart.” Y’all can judge the accuracy of that title for yourselves.

The Weather: Highs in the 60s and 70s this week with partly cloudy skies throughout. It’ll probably rain today and on Friday, though.