10 o’clock list: 7 Signs That Prove Kenyon People Like Smoking

Sure we can do silly things like “open a dialogue” or “vote” on this upcoming all-campus smoking ban. Or, if you’re like one of these people, you can get a Sharpie, find a “No Smoking” sign, and take matters into your own hands. I’ve scoured the campus to bring you 7 Signs That Prove Kenyon People Really Like Smoking:

1. Nosferatu Smoking
Nosferatu Smoking

I like this one. It’s understated, yet an excellent tribute to M. Night Shamylan’s favorite OG German expressionist vampire flick. Speaking of which, if that was you on the phone and you on the bus, then who’s been flicking the lights

2. No Smoking Pie
I’ve seen this one quite a few times. Normally I’m not a fan of clichés, but that crust looks so irresistibly flaky that I’m guilty of trying to eat it on occasion. Bonus points for the intersecting lines that are reminiscent of M.C Esther’s impossible cube. Like, woah.

3. Piano Smoking

Piano SmokingJudging by how wiggly that keyboard looks, I think it’s safe to say that those ivories have been tickled quite enough. Gross.

4. Oh No Smoking!
Oh No Smoking!

What?! Smoking? Within 30 feet of an entrance to a building and/or residence hall?! The horror! THE HORROR! It’s even scarier after you realize this sign is a few paces away from the #1 rated freshman smoke spot on campus.

5. N.O.R.E Smoking

NORE Smoking

To be honest, I don’t know what’s going on here. Maybe somebody tried writing “snore” smoking but the ‘s’ got erased? That’d explain the ‘X’. No, that’s not it. I like to think that somebody witnessed N.O.R.E, the rapper from Queens popular for his hit single “Nothin’,” smoking in that very spot and was so excited that he/she marked an X at the spot and forever memorialized his brief Kenyon cameo onto a humorous plaque. Or maybe I’m reading too deeply into this thing…

6. Patriotic Gnome Smoking

Patriotic Gnome Smoking

He looks more like an ogre, but I’m not in a position to judge anybody with the lung capacity to handle that ginormous of a stogie.

7. … Anything Other Than Weed!

Fine Print

And this is why you should always read the fine print. But wait, people at Kenyon smoke weed?!?

Note: Graffiti, although entertaining at times, is still vandalism. Not only is it a crime and a total violation of school policy, it also makes this place look a lot less pretty. Don’t do it, yo.  unless you’re really good at it.  

15 responses

  1. As an avid smoker from age 14 to approx. 2 months ago, I totally have no grounds to judge anyone decisions. I love(d) smoking cigarettes.
    Still, I think the attitude that “it doesnt matter/we’re young/the worlds gonna end in fire/ice anyway” is really dangerous. I maintained that attitude for most of my life, until I was told I had a premature form of cervical cancer a few months ago. I was very lucky in having an early diagnosis and relatively painless surgical procedure esp considering the alternatives. The risk of cervical cancer is tripled for smokers and young women are increasingly being diagnosed. Maybe it sounds cheesy, but your life is totally important and I didn’t realize how much my health mattered until I was rushed into surgery in a Mount Vernon Hospital… This is just to say: being a social smoker isn’t a “joke”; it’s a meaningful life choice that will probably effect you. I know I sound like an old fart. Just smoke weed everyone? Weed is chill…

    • Weed is bad for you and it’s illegal.
      It’s just as bad as cigarettes.
      You’re a failure of a role model.

      #5 is not N.O.R.E. smoke; it’s MORE SMOKING.
      FAIL

  2. Lucy, thanks so much for sharing your story. That was really brave. I’ve found it really easy to get caught up in the social smoking “scene” here, and what you’ve said is an important reality check for us all. SMOKE WEED! RUSTLER, BUY A VAPE!

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