10 o’clock list: Types of Vegetarians at Kenyon

An EggplantAn eggplant.

Kenyon students have very confusing eating habits. They only eat omelets on Sundays, they eat bowls of cottage cheese with tomatoes, they call themselves gluten free but eat gluten-filled food on the daily, they were/are/or going to someday be vegan. But, it’s the vegetarians that seem to dominate this campus. I am writing this (before you tear me apart) as someone who has been both a vegan and a vegetarian; a breakdown of the types of vegetarians at Kenyon:

  1. The real vegetarian – I mean, these people just really don’t ever eat any meat.
  2. The Kenyon vegetarian – There are many of us who are skeptical about where one gets fish from in rural Ohio, but we still eat those burrito things. The Kenyon vegetarian is your vegetarian friend who isn’t actually a vegetarian, but who eats vegetarian at Kenyon because they don’t trust the meat.
  3. The vegetarian who loves grilled chicken – This is the casual vegetarian who really just eats vegetables a lot. When this person hears that there is grilled chicken, they may run to the servery and stand in line for twenty minutes to add to their colorful salad bar selection. They eat grilled chicken and chicken tortilla soup, but not turkey or any other meat…except on special occasions.
  4. The real vegan – Let’s not discount these folks. They have to work pretty hard to be able to stay alive while eating in Peirce.
  5. The faux-vegan – This is the vegan who still eats eggs and the occasional Papa John’s on a Saturday night. They explain that being a vegan is a rough road and can’t quite tell you why they decided to do it:
  • Me: So, why’d you decide to be a vegan?
  • Them: Oh, I don’t really know. Just wanted to change it up.
  • Me: Right, right…I see.

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