Uphill: Gettin’ Schwastey — Finally, the time of year is upon us when we can live up to that media hype and party till the cows come home. For first years, brace yourself for a weekend of sweat, debauchery, and exposed breasts. I don’t know. Sounds like a normal night for me.

Downhill: There Are No More Original Costume Ideas— Now, I’m only a sophomore, but already the shouts of “Look at me, I’m going as a Republican!” have gotten old. This goes for lawyer/mistress/CEO as well. We get it. You’re a free spirit. You know what would really shock your mom? If you got off your ass and cleaned your goddamn room.