Our second weekend of Kenyon has come and gone (almost) and after two weekends of grungy New Apt parties and badly lit Taft celebrations I’m sure you are all wondering how to elevate your party scene and take everything up a notch. College is a time for growth and change and what better way to show how capable of growth you are then to throw the most elegant and expensive looking party Kenyon has ever seen. You will be the talk of the town. Read on for a brief list of ways to spice up even the mustiest of parties.

1. Focus on your decor: Every good party starts with the party environment. It is easy to trick party guests into thinking your moldy New Apt is a luxurious Aspen Ski Lodge with just a few simple decorative items. Christmas lights are a must. Head on down to Pat Catan’s and purchase some inexpensive Christmas lights. The right kind of lighting makes all the difference. That lady/gent who sits next you in Abnormal Psych may start to look a little bit better when viewed through the haze of twinkling lights. Another simple décor trick is to decorate with colorful mason jars. They are easy to find and to own. They can also be used as fancy vessels with which to sip cheap beer.
2. Buy cheap speakers: Here is a fun and useful fact…Walmart sells pretty decent iPod speakers for 25 dollars. An elevated surround sound makes any old party seem like the Fourth of July.
3. Buy cheap booze and put it in expensive bottles: This one may be a bit deceitful, but hey all’s fair in love and party planning. Head on down to CVS and buy the cheapest vodka possible. Then proceed to pour it into expensive looking bottles. Everyone will think you splurged in a big way. All of your partygoers will love you…that is until the next morning hang-over.
4. Pick wildflowers: Head on down to the BFEC and pick some of the gorgeous wildflowers that are currently flourishing. Simply place the handmade bouquets in old wine bottles. Before you know it, you will have elevated the swamp-like atmosphere of your New Apt into something entirely swanky.
5. Clean your bathroom before company arrives: This is one is pretty obvious but a clean bathroom can do wonders for any event.
6. Use incense: In my opinion, incense always adds a mystical feel any gathering to which it is invited. Nothing says sophistication like a little bit of sweet smelling air.*

*This might also earn you a visit from your CA or the fire department, so maybe don’t actually do it.