A Shout-Out to Them First-Years

excited cat

It’s official 2017, you’re a part of Kenyon now

The Thrill would like to extend its congratulations to the class of 2017 for surviving its first month at Kenyon. And now, a poem:

Congrats dear First Years

A month has passed

Now you’ve learned the ways of Kenyon

Maybe you’ve gotten a little ass

At Old Kenyon parties you do dance

And the Mcbride laundry room has swallowed your pants

To the Kenyon Krud you said hit me

And the Krud replied, bitch please

You now feel a part of the Kenyon society

And have gotten wasted of the white girl variety

But now dear First Years, it’s time to go

For we have papers to write and places to go

But do remember that you’re a part of the gang

And keep it all purple, every-thang.

10 responses

  1. The Time has come children! The Time has come! Fire rains from the sky and the oceans turn to soured milk! March! March! March! March! March! March! March! March! March! March! There’s nothing for us here! Nothing! Nothing! To the woods! To the woods! Escape! Escape! Escape! If the meaning of life has become doubtful, if one’s relations to others and to oneself do not offer security, then fame is one means to silence one’s doubts. It has a function to be compared with that of the Egyptian pyramids or the Christian faith in immortality: it elevates one’s individual life from its limitations and instability to the plane of indestructability; if one’s name is known to one’s contemporaries and if one can hope that it will last for centuries, then one’s life has meaning and significance by this very reflection of it in the judgments of others. Escape!

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