10 o’clock List: 5 Professors We Would Cast for “Hey Arnold!”

hey arnold im just a kid with a cat

This week we’re throwing way back and casting the Philosophy department for every 90s kid’s childhood favorite: “Hey Arnold!”. Please excuse our 90s prose.

1.  Professor Richeimer as Grandpa Phil. Acting as Arnold’s personal advice guru, back in the day we may have referred to him as mad dank, yo. According to Wikipedia he also had a bench max of 210 pounds. Gramps got swole.


hey arnold grandpa phil2. Professor Lottenbach as Gerald. Supa chill and popular with the ladies, Gerald like Lottenbach had a slammin’ hair-do.


hey arnold dancing

3.  Professor Waller as Phoebe. Let’s just say Phoebe wasn’t tardy to the intellectu-party.


hey arnold phoebe

4. Professor DePascuale as Arnold. The original hipster who was deeply misunderstood because his plaid shirt was thought to be a kilt.


hey arnold arnold

5. Professor Bradner as Helga. Was Helga a little bit off? Damn skippy! But her soul was as tortured as her uni-brow was long.


hey arnold helga

hey arnold helga 2

Guest Star: Professor Xiao as Stoop Kid. 


hey arnold stoop kid

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