Hey!? … Yeah, it has been a long time. … You look different. Did you do something with your hair? … How’s you roommate? Still breaking your things in the middle of the night? … Yeah, same … Have you been working out? … No? Must be the poor lighting.
We apologize for not writing or even calling. We obviously haven’t been doing our job in the love department as of late. But we are back and raring to go. Peirce Dates are back and accepting applicants who are not afraid of awkward conversations with strangers. For those of our readers who are unfamiliar with The Thrill’s dating service, a Peirce Date it is a lovely thing where the yentas at The Thrill set two people up on a blind date at Peirce, and then we find out how it went. Hilarity ensues.
It was a cold, dark night on our hill top when Rosa Shipley ’17 and Chris Wright ’14 met for the first time in our castle of food. I spotted Ms. Shipley hovering around the dish return area, clutching a bowl of salad and looking wide eyed. After exchanging pleasantries, I escorted Ms. Shipley over to a reserved table to wait for her date, Mr. Wright. This was my first meeting with Ms. Shipley and I was delighted to have the opportunity to get a acquainted with such a posed and cheerful young woman. We chatted about our mutual friends, giggled at the oddity of the situation and waited. The minutes passed and there was still no Mr. Wright. As the minutes passed I noticed a glint of apprehension in Ms. Shipley’s demeanor. As the church bells signaled 15 minutes pass the hour, Ms. Shipley ask me, “has anyone ever been stood up on a Peirce date?” No, not even close. Not willing to give up on Mr. Wright just yet, I asked Ms. Shipley to wait a little bit longer for her date.
Through a series of text messages I was able to get a hold of Mr. Wright’s telephone number. I made a phone call. No answer. I sent a text message. No reply. I call again. Still no answer. Not wanting to have Ms. Shipley eat her greens alone, I invited her to sit with my gal pals and me. We made jokes to distract her from her obvious disappointment. When one friend asked Ms. Shipley how she felt after being seemingly stood up, she graciously replied, “I don’t think I put that much in to the relationship, so I’m o.k. with it.” Wisdom beyond her years.
And just when I thought all hope was lost and I had transcribed a few questions for Ms. Shipley (for the anti-Peirce-Date article obviously entitled, “The Peirce Date The Never Was: Rosa & Chris,” Mr. Wright arrived in the flesh. He apologized profusely and gave a more than reasonable explanation for why he was late to his date. All was forgiven.
I left our two contestants alone to observe from afar. I couldn’t hear any part of their conversation, but both parties seemed very animated. Laughter, smiles, magic. The stage is set.
Contestant #1, Rosa Shipley:
- Major: intended English
- Hometown: New York City
- Describe yourself in terms of food: Maybe almond butter with sliced banana and honey on some really oat-y bread
- Ideal date: Engaging in some good convo in the great outdoors
- Your best pick-up line/ice breaker: I wanna live in your socks, so that I can be with you every step of the way
- Where to find you on a Saturday night: Out ‘n’ about
- Best lie you’ve ever told: When I was 8, I pretended my leg was broken for a few hours… not convincing to anyone.
- Best thing about Kenyon: the BFEC
- Worst thing about Kenyon: Peirce granola is kinda salty
- In 20 years you are… hopefully feeling good about being 38 years old!
Contestant #2, Chris Wright ’14
- Major: Biochemistry/IPHS
- Hometown: Los Angeles
- Describe yourself in terms of food: I am similar to an Avocado because I am rough on the outside but creamy inside
- Ideal date: African Safari/Vision quest
- Your best pick-up line/ice breaker: Making a fool of myself….?
- Where to find you on a Saturday night: Passed out on the AD bullseye couch
- Best lie you’ve ever told: I was raised in the jungle by wild boar
- Best thing about Kenyon: The People
- Worst thing about Kenyon: The People
- In 20 years you are… A successful Pediatric Neurologist in Northern California (or abroad) with an architecturally intriguing home in the woods with a garden where I grow my own food. I will hopefully be married with 3+ kids
How the Date Went:
What were your expectations for the Peirce Date?
Ms. Shipley: To have a slightly awkward but really pleasant conversation with someone new.
Mr. Wright: I didn’t expect much besides awkwardness. I didn’t want to take it too seriously because that could come off as intimiDATING.
Did the date meet your expectations?
Ms. Shipley: Absolutely!
Mr. Wright: It actually did not. There was no awkwardness and I really enjoyed myself!
What were the highlights of your conversation?
Ms. Shipley: We had a nice talk about Quakerism for a while, because I went to a Quaker-philosophy high school. Also, hearing about Chris’s ideas for post-Kenyon life was awesome and kind of surreal, because that all feels really far away to me.
Mr. Wright: We talked about having a Quaker-like event where anyone could say whatever they feel without any backlash or conflict. We also talked about the transition to Kenyon and the experience of being a Freshman (Rosa) and a Senior (myself).
How would you compare Peirce to other date locations at Kenyon?
Ms. Shipley: There is no establishment finer.
Mr. Wright: I have never been on a date before this so I can’t say
Ms. Shipley: Definitely.*
Mr. Wright: Yeah!*
*Sparks are definitely flying, my friends!