Jasper Hale can’t get enough of the BFEC

It’s no secret that I read a lot of fanfiction. In fact, I’d even consider myself a connoisseur. Over the years, I’ve read some crazy stuff–including some stories set at Kenyon. I couldn’t tell you what compelled me to type “Kenyon college fanfiction” into Google, but I was very pleased to get three results.

A Morning Run

• Fandom: Twilight
• Summary: Jasper, a newly hired History professor at Kenyon, finds love on the Gap Trail one foggy morning.
• Review: This fic loses points right from the start for being an All Human AU (Alternate Universe, for the fanfic naïve). How could someone choose to not write about Vampires at Kenyon? The author begins by apologizing to locals for any mistakes  she made describing Gambier, but it seems she did her research. It’s not so clear, however, that she looked up what a Liberal Arts school actually is, which is made evident when Jasper thinks to himself “Who knew I would end up in the cold North teaching history to art liberals more interested in the evolution of brush strokes than in the political events that inspired the pictures those strokes depict?”. Disappointingly, we don’t see Jasper teaching HIST 310: The Civil War, but we do get a steamy scene of him and a stranger canoodling on the Gap Trail. I have it on good authority that Kenyon professors have found students doing exactly that, so bonus points for realism.
• Best line: “I’m used to sticking out like a sore thumb in a crowd of dark and fiery Latinos, but here I actually blend in.”
• Read it here

Bugsville, OH

• Fandom: CSI
• Summary: Gil Grissom tells Sara about his plans to teach a summer seminar on forensics at Kenyon, and tries to convince her to come with him.
• Review: The fic gets off to a good start with the promising opening line “Ohio?! Why on Earth would you want to go to Ohio?”, a question which I think we’re all very familiar with. Gil tries to convince Sara to come to Kenyon with him by telling her that they can go canoeing on the Kokosing and that Paul Newman, creator of Newman’s Own chunky salsa, was a former student. I’ve never seen an episode of CSI and can’t judge the fic based on the characterization of Gil and Sara, but I am qualified to judge it as a Kenyon student. The writing is fair, but it’s clear that the author only did minimal research about Kenyon. Gil, an alleged bug enthusiast, didn’t even mention the Great Kenyon Lady Beetle Apocalypse of 2013.
• Best line: “Ohio?! Why on Earth would you want to go to Ohio?”
• Read it here

Mr and Mrs B

• Fandom: Pride and Prejudice
• Summary: In the fourth chapter of this modern love story chronicling the romance of Elizabeth Bennet’s parents, a young Mr. Bennet visits Kenyon for an admission interview.
• Review: Unfortunately, this fanfiction only features a short scene at Kenyon. Joe Bennet, a high school senior, visits Kenyon for an interview. The author succeeds in capturing the stress associated with admissions interviews and how annoying it is to have a cryptic interviewer. After the ambiguously successful interview, Little Prospie Joe tours campus and eats lunch at what we can assume is Middle Ground, a classic visit afternoon. I, for one, would have liked to see Mr. Bennet try to act cool at an Old Kenyon party, but you can’t always get what you want.  Although I can’t speak for the quality of the rest of the fic, AmyNW does a good job of portraying a visit to Kenyon.
• Read it here

Know of any more Kenyon fanfiction? Want to write some Kenyon fanfiction? Post it in the comments!