10 o’clock list: Ways to Use Your QR in Real Life

I should have taken Rocket Science for QR. (via explodingdog.tumblr.com)

I should have taken Rocket Science for QR. (via explodingdog.tumblr.com)

Taking your QR this semester seemed like a good idea (or a last resort after scheduling screwed you over) last May. But finals are coming and so is the urge to just throw down your textbooks, reach your hands up to the sky and ask the clouds, or whatever else may be up there, “Why am I even doing this?” Well, friends. I have answers for you. So keep on studying for your QR, Kenyon. It will possibly come in handy someday.

  1. Microeconomics: So, after graduation, you start interviewing for white collar jobs, right? Imagine: your interview is going poorly and suddenly this obese dude with pit stains who could be your future employer asks you what you think about Monsanto and the corn market. BAM. Your moment to shine. “Well,” you say. “If supply keeps shifting, then the demand will suffer and the market could fail. I think we just need to wait and see what the effects of Monsanto on the industry as a whole before we take action.” He’ll obviously be charmed by your brilliance and you will have a fulfilling career.
  2. Surprises at Infinity: Infinity itself may be useless, but surprise isn’t! In fact, surprise is one of the most important aspects of war, according to many sources. But you’re probably not going to be a general or anything, but it’ll be great to pop out of your cubicle and surprise your coworkers!
  3. Astronomy: Like many parents (or creepy aunts/uncles), you wish to share the joy of reading Harry Potter with your children. But when those little nitwits try to tell you that the name Sirius isn’t significant in some way, you’ll know the mythology to prove them wrong.
  4. Solar Energy: When the sun explodes, killing us all, you’ll totally know why.
  5. Rocket Science: When the sun explodes, killing us all, you won’t have to know why, because you’ll have already constructed a rocket and have been flying out of this galaxy for about thirty years. Just remember to take me with you.

11 responses

    • It’s humor, Dick, humor. Look it up. Your namesake might have lacked any discernable sense of humor, but you can rise above him. you can do it. And, always remember, laughter is the best medicine. Or, take your pill and go back into your cave to sleep.

  1. Pingback: Kenyon Klexicon: Q is for QR | The Thrill

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