D-Cat and Presidents Past


So, as you all have probably heard, our beloved D-Cat was seen cavorting with the country’s illustrious leader: Barack Obama. This got me into a creative exercise (and possibly a future American Studies project?) thinking about what Sean Decatur would talk about with other American Presidents of the past and future if he had a time machine and could.

Rutherford B. Hayes: As a Kenyon alumni, I like to think that the D-Cat would try to find some way to get a bit more of an endowment from Hayes. But Hayes probably wouldn’t listen to him. He probably had better things to do. Like being one of the worst presidents. (But also one of the hottest.)

William Howard Taft: Both Ohio natives, Decatur and Taft would get into a friendly rivalry over which is better: Cleveland (Decatur) or Cincinnati (Taft). After a few cigars, they’d get down to business and talk about initiatives to keep children out of the factories and in the liberal arts.

Franklin Delano Roosevelt: After having the D-Cat look at his stamp collection, FDR says he’ll rely on Kenyon’s President to teach a generation of youngsters the skills necessary to lead the country out of the Great Depression. D-Cat will respond that he’ll teach a generation some liberal arts, so maybe they can do something? (Probably not.)

And, since he’s already in the time machine game, might as well have him go talk to a future POTUS.

The Nuge: She was the first female President of Kenyon College, so why not the United States? And since she and D-Cat are already texting buddies, we can only assume that they’d share their Special Relationship while she’s in the White House.

One response

  1. Seems like the aggregate of scholars places Hayes 25th out of 43 men. “Being one of the worst presidents” seems a bit harsh for a man who was really in the middle of the pack, especially considering he was one of our own.

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