Oh my gosh, John Green was here!!! He did not forget to be awesome if you catch my drift. But there were things that he didn’t talk about. I mean, how could he have spoken about everything in such a short time? But there were definitely gaps that probably needed to be addressed.
- How he feels about being Kenyon’s marketing campaign. I personally would prefer a viral Edwin M. Stanton campaign, but for him it must be rewarding to have his face go to every college junior’s mail box every three weeks. Right?
- How a college student could afford to buy a bagel each morning. I can’t even really afford deodorant at this point. How am I supposed to buy a bagel each morning? Fess up, John Green. How was it that you were making that kind of cash?
- The fact that my shoe was once in a vlogbrothers video. It’s the black shoe. Where’s the recognition I so richly deserve?
- How much quirk a girl needs. I mean, I’m not a teenage girl, so John Green shouldn’t find a way inside me, but Valentine’s Day is coming up and I’m totally ready for a nerdy John Green-written hero to find that his life is worth living because I am so quirky and unconventionally beautiful.
- How to build a table. I mean, I had ordered this table at IKEA, but he didn’t tell me how to build it, so now I’m sort of screwed. (Anyone want to buy it from me? Lemme know.)