This post was co-authored by Claire Berman ’16 and Emma Specter ’15.

As you may be aware, Honors Day was today, and just to answer the question you’re all asking yourselves — no, the Thrill didn’t win anything, but it would have been an honor just to be nominated. (We weren’t. It’s fine. Whatever.) However, we do have some suggestions as to categories that, for whatever reason, weren’t brought up this year — we’re confident that by next spring’s awards, all of these categories will be formally awarded to the most deserving candidates.

1. “The Jean Dunbar Caples Award for Staying in Your Room All The Time”

2. “The Graham Gund Award for Least Variety In a Body of Work”

3. “The Paul Newman/Allison Janney Award for Unquestioned Bangability Across All Demographics (Regardless of Age, Gender, Orientation, etc.)”

4. “The Chef Meagan Award For Most Loveable/Borderline Seductive Internet Presence”

5. “The Sean Decatur Award for Softest Hands/Cutest Dimples.” (Trust us on this one — his hands are soft. And as anyone who’s basked in the warmth of his smile can attest, his dimples are damn cute.)

6. “The Carl Djerassi Award for Me Not Being A Parent Right Now”

7. “The Robie Macauley Award for Unexpectedly Sexy Uses of an English Degree”

8. “The Philander Chase Award for Alienating Members of an Organization You Started”