We are done with school in three weeks. Have you puked yet? Out of stress, I mean? Where are you going to live? What’s the plan? Here are some reason not to look ahead re: finals.
1. Your days of unabashed inebriation are probably coming to a close, either for the summer, or for adult times. “Blah blah blah be an adult, blah blah blah, Maureen, Gramma doesn’t like when you’re blackout.” OKAY, I GET IT.
2. You are almost done and then who knows if you will come back. Like what if the opportunity never arises? What if you live for forever in London or something and you spend the rest of your life talking about how you really want to visit your college one last time? I get kinda mean at this point in the year, sorry guys.
3. Did you know that if you are caught with weed in the real world, you can be arrested? It’s always really interesting to think about things, wouldn’t you think.
4. Finals are in a hot second. Look forward to reading every book ever that you didn’t when you were supposed to.
5. Where are you supposed to make friends/find hot smooches in the world? Have you made an OkCupid? What about a Tinder? Are you engaged? You should probably get engaged soon, right?