10 o’clock list: Ways to Conquer the Meat Sweats

The other day, a common ailment was brought to my attention. Since the Thrill provides advice about everything from sex to the Craft Center, I felt it was about time we conquered a new problem: the meat sweats.

Scenario: you just ate an entire Papa John’s Pepperoni Pizza. You have two options; wallow about it and feel sorry for yourself, or be proactive and do something about your impending meat sweats.

  1. Wear a breathable, weather-wicking shirt – There’s a reason that you’ve never heard of “meat sweaters”—it’s because the only way to beat the meat heat is with light-weight, removable clothing. Cabela’s has a nice selection, as does the sporting section of Wal Mart.
  2. Pair your meat with a nice wine – According to some preliminary research, red wine reduces hot flashes. We are all college-aged men and women eating at Peirce, so I feel like this statistic applies.
  3. Moist toilettes – When the meat sweats hit, keep some moist towels handy to wipe your brow.
  4. Wear deodorant- Competitive eaters recommend Jack Black Pit Boss Anti-perspirant and Deoderant. So say the experts.
  5. Swim – I don’t know. What else are you going to do?

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