How To Have A Quintessential Highlighter Party

Remember when you used to be this? Well now you can but on a friend! (via

Remember when you used to be this? Well now you can but on a friend! (via

If you’re looking forward to an AMAZING NIGHT filled with FUN, FRIENDS and COLORED MARKERS, tone it the fuck down. Highlighter isn’t going to be the college party of your dreams; it’s going to be a weird, smelly mess. Not to worry, though! Messes can be a-okay if you know how to handle them. We here at The Thrill have highlighted a few of tonight’s inevitabilities and have provided some cute little tips to help you keep your shit together.

  • You will have a penis drawn on you. I don’t care how, I don’t care where, and I don’t care when. It’s going to happen. No matter how anatomically detailed your shirt-penis is, laugh it off. You’ll probably throw both the shirt and its genitals away in the morning, anyway.*
  • You will post photos of yourself on Instagram before or during the party. It’s horrifyingly cliché, and you’ll regret it within the week. Look at it as a learning experience. All of us Thrill writers did.
  • You will lose your highlighter. Don’t get too attached to it. You’ll find another marker on the ground within thirty seconds of losing your own.
  • You will hook up with someone on your hall. Wake up Sunday morning, take a shower, and move on. Wave to your sexy buddy in the servery. Smile. You have better things to think about.
  • You will sweat off every single doodle on your t-shirt. Don’t stress about it. Most of them were probably vulgar. And besides, the night is all about making friends and fancy dancing and regretting your life choices.
  • You will say stupid shit. And we will make fun of it.

* If you’re seriously uncomfortable, talk to your CA or a Sexual Misconduct Advisor.

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