As we all know, a holiday season isn’t complete without your beloved family, and there’s nothing like probing questions and awkward situations from the people closest to you (well, in a literal sense anyway) to ruin that good vibe you’ve had from your Friends Netflix binge. Here are some highlights from people just like you!
- “My grandma told me in detail about how she’s read all three fifty shades books multiple times, and how much she truly appreciates the plot. However, she told me that at the youthful age of 19, I was not allowed to read such a book and should wait at least ten years before I engage in such advanced reading.”
- “My aunt took me into the woods to see the grave of her dead dog. The dog has been dead for three years now. She still cried. It was really awkward.”
- “The first thing my uncle asked me when he walked through the door was if any of the girls in my Facebook pictures were “special friends”
- “I was planning over break to introduce my siblings to my girlfriend. However, the first thing my brother asked when I introduced her was if she was my drug dealer.”
- “My cousin insinuated that I might be gay in front of my entire extended family and not gonna lie, I pooped my pants a little.”
- “My aunt gave me a book for Christmas, and the book is entitled “Re-discovering Christianity” because she heard that I hadn’t been confirmed and was worried for my immortal soul.”
- “Well, I got really drunk with my mom and she told me about the time she tried opium.”
- “My aunts and uncles were playing Apples to Apples and the card that came up was “feminist” and they all just started ranting about how much they hate feminists, and my sisters and I just sat there seething in the corner.”
This was over last year’s winter break, but my (conservative German) grandma got drunk and said, “Do you know what the word for nipples is in German?? Breast warts!” And then giggled hysterically.
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