10 o’clock list: Rejected WKCO Shows

Because you’ve always wanted to hear a story about yourself on the radio. (via aestheticamagazine.com)

Yeah, I went to one WKCO meeting. They’ve got a cool vibe, but apparently my ideas were a little too avant garde. Off the wall. Whatever man, I don’t care what the kids are listening to nowadays, I’ve got a real sound, and I’m sure these show ideas will be big someday.

1. Digging Through the Glove Compartment of Your Dad’s Toyota During Your Seven-Hour Road Trip to Kenyon. Another Best of Billy Joel CD? No, no, that’s fine. This one has Just The Way You Are. No, that wasn’t our daddy-daughter dance for my bat mitzvah. Yeah, I’m sure. Hey, is that the audio tape to 1776 by David McCullough? When did you listen to it? Huh, well, we could now. No, that wouldn’t be as interesting as the soundtrack to Oklahoma again. Let’s do that.

2. The Headphones of the Kid Next to You on Third Floor Olin on a Monday at Midnight. Are they listening to Taylor Swift? You’re not quite sure, but that may be the first few lines of Blank Space. Huh. Or wait, is it Mr. Brightside now? Jeez, you haven’t heard that song in literal ages. Who even listens to Mr. Brightside anymore? Too bad its muffled appearance is distracting you from your paper. Have fun guessing.

3. Middle Path Construction. With an added chorus of Timber whenever a tree falls down.

4. The History Major Station. You like Gregorian Chants? We’ve got ’em. American Civl War-era folk songs? We got those, too. Chinese Guoyue music from the early years of the People’s Republic? We’ve got that in spades. You know what we don’t have? Anything you actually want to listen to.

5. Songs You Listen to Before Ordering from the Cove. It’s really just an hour of Time to Say Goodbye on repeat once a week every week. You’re welcome.

One response

  1. [This name has been moderated for violating our comment policy, as it is a personal attack against a member of the Kenyon community.] says:

    [This comment has been moderated for violating our comment policy, as it is a personal attack against a member of the Kenyon community.]

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