Kenyon to Add “Green” North Campus Parking, No Students Allowed

Green Parking Areas

Is this Kenyon’s future? (Via imresolt.blogspot.com)

This morning, an anonymous College official disclosed a North Campus parking initiative to The Thrill. The College will impart on an environmentally friendly parking project this June behind Gund Commons, expecting to finish construction by August 2015 — just in time for the start of the next academic year.However, something is amiss with this initiative, or rather … Amish. In an effort to discourage students from bringing cars to school, the parking lot will be for alternative vehicles only — that is, Amish buggies, faculty bikes, and other emissions-free modes of transportation. Distinct from other parking zones, this lot will be entirely green and literally made out of grass.

“Asphalt is unsightly,” said the official. “Kenyon is a beautiful place full of student life and wildlife. We don’t want to turn it into a suburban take on a concrete jungle. Denison has already done that.”

But what about the winter months? Is a grass parking lot really sustainable? “The administration has and will continue to reply with this answer: ‘This is the future of parking. As for its practicality, just think — what happens to golf courses in the winter? They manage to survive. People still golf in the winter, people still bike in the winter and the Amish still need a place to keep their horses while they sell their wares in the winter.’ It might be a flawed reply, but it’s what the administration will maintain.” This reply is hardly bulletproof and is sure to raise a variety of objections. The official notes:

“The College knows it’s a poor defense of the project; however, sustainability and green initiatives are what make great admissions booklets. The project is cost-effective, and perhaps from very, very afar, appears to be innovative. They’ll go through with it.”

Not considering the potential pragmatic objections to the project, the administration also anticipates backlash from the student body. Relying on the sturdy excuse that Kenyon is a “walking campus,” it is unlikely that the administration will be open to permitting students to park in the new lot. Do you have an opinion? Tell us in the comments!

3 responses

  1. As an alumni, I’m pretty disgusted by the unnecessary jab at dennison as a petty method of pandering this terrible idea.

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