Peirce has been increasing their ice cream and frozen yogurt game recently, and in the past few weeks we’ve seen flavors from blueberry to passion fruit. Peirce ice cream is tried and true and always a solid meal choice. What would happen though if there were Kenyon flavors? What is the most quintessential Kenyon flavor?
- Old Kenyon. This one will deceive you with its look. Three flavors make the treat so perfect: Keystone light, sweat, and small traces of vomit. Just like Neapolitan ice cream brings you back to tea with your grandmother, this treat will bring you back to that last time you ran out of Old K, your hair stuck to your forehead with sweat, and accidentally peed in front of all the DKEs. College, man!
- Sunday Morning. Putting bits of food in ice cream is groundbreaking. While cake batter and brownie ice cream are good, you’re missing out if you haven’t had Sunday Morning. This ice cream consists of small pieces of stale Papa John’s pepperoni pizza from last night mixed in with spilt red wine squeezed out of your carpet. Yummy and classy!
- The Cove. Everyone is obsessed with this flavor on campus. Another food and ice cream mix, the ice cream takes mac and cheese wedges and mixes them with whatever vodka was found behind the bar. You technically need an ID for this flavor, but most time people can take it without anyone noticing! But watch out, you only can get this flavor when it’s Cove o’clock and you hate yourself.
- Olin. This flavor freaks some people out, and its color reminds most of post-Cold War era architecture. A mix of Red Bull, stolen staplers, and Adderall, this one will probably make you scream but somehow keep you coming back.
- The Feral Cat. You never know what this flavor will bring. Sometimes you get a bit of road kill, sometimes dead fleas are mixed in, or if you’re lucky you might even get a dead bird in your ice cream too! Everyone loves this flavor, and if you say you hate it prepare to get hate mail for the rest of your Kenyon career.
Any other amazing ice cream flavors you want to see at Peirce? Let us know in the comments!