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We Got Written Up: The Sequel

May 8, 2016

(via kinja-img.com)

Background: A few weeks ago, a few Seniors who lived in Norton three years ago had a reunion party. In the process of reminiscing, we found ourselves back in Norton (with alcohol). Unsurprisingly, we got caught by the CAs after inviting ourselves into the room of two First Years. The following is a minute-by-minute account of the conduct meeting. (A few of us also were written up in Norton as First Years, so comparisons between then and now are included).

4:30 PM – The 16 of us file into the small conference room in the Housing and ResLife Office. They clearly never have meetings with this many people. A few of us have to grab chairs from a stack in the corner.

4:32 PM – An officer from the Student Rights Office joins us. We are all given copies of the Student Handbook and asked to read “Rights of the Respondent.” First impression: this process is a lot more formal than it was 3 years ago.

4:36 PM – The officer explains the difference between a formal hearing and an informal hearing. Again, I don’t think we were given this option three years ago.

4:37 PM – Roll Call. All but one are accounted for!

4:38 PM – Copies of the incident report are passed out. This one is much less detailed than the last one, though it’s probably because there was a lot less to detail here.

4:40 PM – The officer ask for comments from all of us. An awkward silence settles in the room before one of the seniors explains the events of the evening.

4:41 PM – The group unanimously decides to have an informal hearing.

4:42 PM – The First Years are dismissed as the officer (in an oddly formal sounding way) “finds the Seniors responsible.”

4:44 PM – The “responsible parties” are getting a warning. The officer reminds us alcohol has to stay in Upperclass residential areas ONLY and reminds us of some areas that alcohol is not allowed, like in Norton.

4:46 PM – We all laugh and then we’re dismissed. Case closed. I will say that despite it being more formal, this process was a lot more efficient than our last alcohol infraction meeting.

Moral of the story: don’t get caught drinking in your First Year dorm. And if you do go back to reminisce, don’t leave a case of Keystone in the hallway as you go into someone’s room.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Anonymous permalink
    May 8, 2016 5:26 pm

    The fact that you all think this is worth writing about just shows how boring you all are…

  2. Abigail R. Esman '82 permalink
    May 9, 2016 3:05 am

    Jesus Christ am I glad I went to Kenyon when I did and not now.

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