BREAKING: Domino’s Pizza Now Takes K-Card, Waistbands Everywhere Groan in Disapproval
As if the graveyard of empty pizza boxes I store underneath my XL twin bed frame needed any new corpses, Domino’s has finally decided to jump on the K-Card bandwagon. Beginning right the heck now, you can order hot, fresh, flavor-blasted Domino’s pizzas (cooked especially for you in the corporation’s Mount Vernon location) using that weird plastic rectangle you scan on your dorm’s card reader each and every night.
The steps to achieve Domino’s-Induced PizzaBliss™ were sent out via email earlier today. According to Mark Kohlman, the process goes a little something like this:
1. Enter your address2. Select your desired food items3. Go to Checkoutthe next couple of steps are critical4. Enter your K-card # in the box labeled: DELIVERY INSTRUCTIONS5. Select Payment Information: PAY WITH CASH UPON DELIVERY (you won’t have to pay with cash upon delivery if you entered you K-card # as instructed in #4.6. Select Place Order7. Wait8. Enjoy your food