We like to stay pretty competitive here at The Thrill, and a Blog Off is one way we can definitively prove that one of us is objectively a better blogger (dare we say, a better person). So we leave it to you, the reader, to decide in a blind taste test who is really better as we square off on various topics. This time around, we have Erica Christie ‘19 and Mia Fox ‘19, two sophomores battling it out RE: Old Side vs. New Side Who will come out on top? Only you can decide.
So it has come to this – old versus new side. For millennia our history has known only one Old Side–New Side Controversy. Today we do not speak of that division within the Presbyterian church of colonial America. No, today our holy communion will be served by Sauce Lady. Today we drink from the cup overflowing with kaleidoscopic beams of sunlight. Today we sup upon toasted wooden tables and benches. Today we eat in Old Side. To the unknowledgeable, Old Side is at its best “basically Harry Potter,” and at its worst, a dank, elitist excuse for a dining hall.
But you know better.
I can’t disregard the bad rap Old Side gets. It is dominated by Greeks and sports teams, and said Greeks and said sports teams have laid claim to many a table. Space to sit becomes an issue if you’d rather not sit cheek-to-cheek with your favorite basketball player. That being said, if any newcomer encroaches on a table, things get uncomfortable at most. Aside from that, Old Side of Peirce is genuinely welcoming.
Whether it be the peanut butter jars smiling at you as you enter or the cozy wood wrapping you in warmth, Old Side undeniably has its perks. If I can’t convince you, maybe Sauce Lady can. And hey New Side, where’s the book published on your stained glass windows?
I’m a simple blogger. I only require a few things to stay content with life here on this campus of perpetual construction, hormones, and feral cats. The number one thing on that list is easy access to a warm meal and good conversation. You hear that, Old Side? Easy. I’m not here to engage in the mind games of who-sits-where or perform the barrel roll double back handspring limbo contest required to slide into those goddamned benches. No. Mama’s gotta eat. I’m not trying to cause a scene, I’m just trying to make sweet sweet love to this Eggplant Parmesan.
That brings us to New Side, land of creepy bird shadows and that one phallic statue dangling from the ceiling. See? Already built in conversation topics! Who wants to look up at a bunch of windows and only be able to acknowledge that Herbert Sherbert wrote something called Moby Dick? No thank you, my dudes. I want to be able to point out that there are penises hanging from the ceiling and engage in the magic of friendship.
In summary, use your brains, follow your heart, fuck Old Side.