Listen up y’all cause this is it: we have a new semester on our hands and it’s beginning to feel like we’ve settled into a routine. Lance Bass has come and gone and Olin is once again a second home. We’ve embraced our lives here at Kenyon, let’s embrace all the discomfort that comes with it. Let it wash over you. Cleanse you. This is water. This is uncomfy. Here’s some things that make me uncomfy.
- The tenderness with which people working doors at all-campuses caress your hands as they adorn you with the iconic Underage X’s. The touch so gentle, I so undeserving. There’s something uncomfy about the gentleness of a stranger when you know you’re arriving at their event to sweat your eyeliner off and maybe cry. (Bonus points go to the morning-after realization that you’ve stamped yourself 30 times with the X on your hand in the middle of the night.)
- The market at 11:30pm on any given night. We’ve all been there. Waiting in the long line with fellow dead-eyed Market Ghosts while clutching your Flaming Hot Cheetos and Red Bull four-pack for dear life. Never forget that the market workers have truly seen the dark side of this campus.
- That one section of Peirce. Why are the eggs next to the yogurt next to the cottage cheese next to the mandarin oranges next to the pasta salad next to the quinoa? What is going on? Are you there God?
- The alarming amount of dead people on and near campus. I don’t know, just think about it.
- Outdoor charging stations. We get it, Kenyon. You’re cool. Can we have our fairy lights back? (Author’s Note: I am excited about the charging stations I promise they will probably save my life sometime in the near future thank you charging stations all hail the 2020 plan).