The Monday Catchup


Heinz doesn’t pay me enough for this product placement. Hell, they don’t pay me at all.

Happy Halloween kids! I saw all of you tricking and treating this weekend, but why end the celebration now? I will personally be throwing down and throwing them back tonight* in honor of all that is freaky. In fact I compiled a little cheat sheet of halloween party tips If you choose to partake in festivities with me.

-The Krud is going around. To ensure that it does not spread, sanitize all your candy. Take  the wrappers off of the candy and wash it clean with warm, soapy water.

-Create your own scary decorations by printing out pictures of the darkest, dankest corner in Olin.

-Carrots, Cucumbers, and Bell Peppers are all great snack options if your warped idea of a party includes a veggie tray.

Hopefully these tips will prevent any future party blunders, because it sounds like you made quite a few this weekend, Kenyon. Here’s what you had to say.

I almost left my house with a bra dangling from my pocket.

I really wrecked my body this weekend.

Only the good pumpkins die young (said while caressing a pile of pumpkin pulp)

My children! Wow! I can tell you are making Dad so proud. Don’t tell him about that bra stuff. He would be weirded out. Ok? You just keep up the good work. Maybe take a break and go to these things since you’ve been working so hard.

What: Francophone Film Festival: Closing Reception & Qu’Allah benisse la France! (2014)

  • The Francophone Film Festival is organized by Pierre Dairon, assistant professor of French, and the Kenyon College Department of Modern Languages and Literature, in collaboration with the Gund Gallery. Qu’Allah benisse la France! concludes the two month long festival.
  • Le français? Je le parle un peu.

When: Wednesday, September 14 at 6:00pm to 9:00pm

Where: Gund Gal

What: “Savage in Limbo” by John Patrick Shanley

  • “Savage in Limbo” tells the story of a group of regulars in a Bronx bar, consisting of a failed nun, a taciturn bartender, a perennial loner, a macho boyfriend, and a confused lover.
  • This is the senior thesis of Jasmine Manuel and Caitelin McCoy!
  • KCDC shows make my nipples hard.

When: Friday, November 4 at 8:00pm to 10:30pm and Sunday,  November 6 at 8:00pm to 10:30pm

Where: Hill Theater

What: Spoken Word Poetry with Remi Kanazi

  • Join Kenyon Students for Justice in Palestine for a night of spoken word poetry with Remi Kanazi.
  • Remi is a poet and writer based in New York City. He is the author the newly released collection of poetry, “Before the Next Bomb Drops: Rising Up From Brooklyn to Palestine.”

When: Thursday, November 3 at 7:00pm to 8:00pm

Where: The Horn

*by “throwing down and throwing them back” I mean that I’ll be totally sober and not throwing a party because I’ll be on duty, and I care about my body.

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