A Formal Apology (We’re Super Serious About This We Promise)

So it’s come to my attention via this post that was posted at 4 p.m. today. Apparently freshmen are human beings who have feelings, and are very okay with publicly saying they were wronged. Who would have thought? Anyway, we’re sorry that we tied you up with rusty chains and made you sleep on a mattress in the middle of the Kokosing.

To be fair, I know you’re worried about getting Tetanus, if you’re up to date on your immunizations that shouldn’t be an issue. See folks, there’s an unlimited number of reasons to vaccinate your children.

As a peace offering, we are giving the trash can flannel to Michael Audet ’20, who spoke out so bravely about his initiation experience,  which was previously going to be a reward for our GoFundMe to one of our new writers. If you still want to support our GoFundMe page, we’re offering a replacement reward, you will be put in a raffle to receive the rusty chains that we used to tie our freshmen rushes up.

But yeah this was totally our bad we have no idea how to do initiation. Hopefully next year will be better. Less chains and graves and more hard boiled eggs. Everyone loves eggs.

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