Peirce has fake LaCroix now, and we decided to blind taste test it against real LaCroix to give you honest reviews of our beloved dining hall’s newest feature. Comments from Mia Fox, Michael Audet, Tyler Raso, and Mollie Greenberg.

Revolet Rain Blood Orange:

I’m getting citrusy

Did you let it aerate?

The only thing I know about wine tastings is from that one episode of How I Met Your Mother

Smells citrusy kind of tastes like acid. Like sulfuric

I’m really getting the seltzer

I don’t like it it doesn’t taste good

I’m a seasoned vet

Describe it in three words:

Michael: smoky orange breath

Mia: zesty orange sandalwood

Tangerine LaCroix:

It smells like a lemon

It smells like lemon scented pledge

This smells like a clementine!

There’s a book called Clementine that I really liked in sixth grade. She was a sassy bitch

Jerry Spinelli is a hack

I feel refreshed, but not as refreshed as with the other one

Wait, one of these is real LaCroix?

On mixing them together: hybrid is overwhelming

I feel like Peirce might have some clementine bullshit

They were both right about which one was fake and which one was real!

Describe it in three words:

Michael: grandmother’s hair clementine

Mia: clementine. for. sure.

Revolt Rain Lemon Blueberry:

Smells like sweet

The scent is really throwing me off

It’s two things?

This is like skinny can LaCroix, those are expensive!

Is it grape Gatorade?

I think it is grape Gatorade

Ambiguous tropical, as if tropical isn’t already ambiguous enough

I think my wisdom teeth are growing in

Mollie: Peircey, fruity, wet

Tyler: sock tasting, sockish

Describe it in three words:

Mia: bath and bodyworks

Michael: bed bath andbeyond

Grapefruit LaCroix:

I don’t want to drink this the smell is so pungent

I smell nothing

This better be fake LaCroix I don’t like this at all

I’m so excited to take my antibi tonight, so lit for antibiotics

It’s grapefruit???

Oh my god, what?

Take your vitamin c!

Describe it in three words:

Mollie/Mia: Emer gen c

Michael: ashy, juicy, fruit

General consensus: it’s all just fruity bubbly water and nothing matters.