As we all know, Kenyon is a special place. This Hill sometimes feels like a world of its own, with a set of its very own social codes and happenings exclusive to Gambier, OH. I’ve taken the time to compile some of the most common Kenyon phenomenons so that the next time you see it happen, you can slap a name on it.
- The Lookaround: when you’re about to dish some juicy, hot gossip but need to get a 360 view of whether the subject of said gossip or their friends are nearby. Usually just a precaution, but because our school is a mile long, a necessary one.
- Musical Parking Space: when it’s your senior year and you’re finally living in an NCA and you drive everywhere because you’re an asshole, you’ll need to find somewhere in town to park – but because of the two-hour time limits, you occasionally have to move your car. The Musical Parking Space happens when you see the same car in multiple spots in town over the course of a single day.
- The Dismount: when you get off your bike by swinging one leg over the seat so that both of your legs are on one side as you glide, effortlessly, into the bike rails. It makes you look kinda cool but that coolness factor is minimized because about 50 percent of Kenyon bike users do this.
- Selective Vision: when you walk through New Side and make intentionally distant, unfocused eye contact with people as you try and figure out who you’d like to share your meal with. Can be performed in tandem with the Walkthrough, where you pass through New Side on the way to the servery so as to maximize Selective Vision options, only settling on a spot once you’ve been standing in the sandwich bar line for five minutes.
- Kenyon Kwestioning of Oneself and One’s Ability: when your professor attempts to give you a specific day that your essays will be graded; in searching for this date, they appear to doubt and then challenge themselves to actually meet this deadline – which may or may not be possible for them. The nod they give when they decide on the deadline is at once resolute and reason for you to suspect that you’ll have your paper back in two to three to four weeks.