BLOG OFF: TRAN ’19 vs. WINER ’19

BLOG OFF: TRAN ’19 vs. WINER ’19

We like to stay pretty competitive here at The Thrill, and a Blog Off is one way we can definitively prove that one of us is objectively a better blogger (dare we say, a better person). So we leave it to you, the reader, to decide in a blind taste test who is really better as we square off on various topics. This time around, we have two juniors Elise Tran ’19 and Nate Winer ’19 battling it out RE: Which weekend is the proper Halloweekend? The 27th-29th or the 3rd-4th?  Who will come out on top? Only you can decide.

Blogger A

As Halloween fast approaches, I think it’s time to delve into my theory of the months. October is the spookiest month, November is the creepiest. Think of it this way: October is when the leaves start to die, but are still on the trees and when pumpkins are at their best (spooky jack-o-lanterns, I love it). November has grey skies (the color of decay, I think. I went to a morgue once for class in high school but didn’t see the dead body up close) and all the leaves are gone, so the trees don’t even look like trees anymore, just weird wooden fingers from the ground (fucking creepy).

Halloween is a celebration of the spooky: a spookybration. It’s the last hurrah of the spookiest month before we descend into the doom and gloom of terrifying November. November 1st is the point of no return, once we pass that threshold it’s too late. Everything from then on out is all creepy, all the time, and creepy isn’t something to be celebrating. We need to fear the creepy. Creepy is how we end up dead, you’ve all seen movies. Halloween is fun and festive and SPOOKY, and so is October, and that’s why the end of October is the only acceptable time to celebrate Halloweekend.

Blogger B
The grounds crew mowing the lawn at seven in the morning during finals week, freshmen showing up to the all-campus party exactly at ten, an 8:10 class, celebrating Halloween the weekend of the 27th to 29th, premature ejaculation. What do all of these things have in common? That’s right, they all suck because they happen too early, too soon, no thank you, not here for it. Lame.
Why can’t you people just keep your spooky in your pants for, like, three more days? So what it’s no longer October?—the concept of months and weeks are human constructed concepts meant to quantify and impress meaning upon our otherwise meaningless existence. Ho hum, we all die anyway. So go ahead, celebrate Halloween the weekend of October Twenty-stupid. When you see me November 3rd with all the Cool Kids, the Fashionably Late, the Hope In The Omelet Line Three Minutes Before Closing-ers, I’ll be the one dressed as you but sexy.

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