10 o’clock list: hairstyles to broadcast that you are Struggling™

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You’re going through an identity crisis. A breakup. Your gum got caught in your hair during a good old-fashioned Old Kenyon DFM (dancefloor makeout). Maybe you’re chopping off another useless three inches. Maybe you’re dyeing your ends to signal to the world that you’re dying inside. I’ve done it. You’ve done it. Let’s talk hairstyles that broadcast to the public that you are Struggling™.

  1. Do it yourself bangs: are you bored or are you sad? Put down those rusty scissors.
  2. Do it yourself bangs but tiny: you know exactly what I’m talking about.
  3. Do it yourself Bright Red dye job: dye kit courtesy of Wal-mart! Enter the bathroom sink and emerge a la Little Mermaid.
  4. A pixie cut you’ll regret as soon as the hairdresser adds the finishing touches: you wanted to cut off the dead ends like you cut off that dead weight of a significant other. Alas, if only your vision matched the results and your penchant for long hair.   
  5. Kim Kardashian moist hair: Let’s be real: you haven’t washed your hair in days. But if a Kardashian can do it, why can’t you?

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