Becoming a Diamond on Old Bob’s Necklace of Kindness; An Insider’s Guide

diamond old bob    How can you become a diamond on Old Bob’s necklace of kindness? I honestly have no idea. He’s never even given me a second look when I walk up to the dessert section (which is frequently).

Maybe one day I will gain that status but alas, it is still beyond my reach as of now. In a search for the secret ingredients to get on that damn necklace of kindness I talked to some Old Bob Diamonds© to see what they did right. Here’s what they said:

“Nail the elbow high five/hug thing”

“Always have a smile on your face like getting that dessert is the best thing to happen to you that day. And honestly, it probably is.”

“Write him a poem”

“Talk to him and be nice to him and smile”

“Take more than one dessert. Like take two or three. But not more than two or three because that would be like, suspicious and you could creep him out.”

“Dye your hair, put on some highlighter and mascara, wear ten inch heals, and knock his socks off.”

 

Share your thoughts on this post.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s