10 o’clock List: Ways I Almost Died at Kenyon

Image result for kenyon college ascension hall

courtesy of Kenyon’s website

Here’s the thing everyone: sometimes I’m a real dumbass. Like, in terms of Book Smarts and being a Learned Young Man, no, I’m not dumb in that regard. In fact I like to think I’m pretty smart, if it’s all the same. But just in life? Real dullard, every now and then. And the danger about being a fool out there in the world is… well, danger, which I seem to find myself in more times than my parents would be comfortable with, probably. So, that being said, here’s some of the times I nearly died on this campus because I was being stupid:

  1. The time I almost fell off the railing of the Squad balcony: Always wear shoes with good traction if you plan to clamber up high, friends.
  2. The time I got very sick and forgot how to take care of myself: FLUIDS! You simply gotta have them, especially when you’re sick. But sophomore year Nate forgot this vital piece of info, which led to a week-long illness which featured nearly fainting several times, as well as hallucinations both auditory and visual! Fun stuff!
  3. The time I was almost murdered in the woods by a mystery man in a truck: I mean, this one’s kind of self-explanatory to be honest. Avoid mystery men in the woods in the middle of the night.
  4. The time I almost fell off the roof of the New Apt. laundry hut: In all fairness this one probably wouldn’t have killed me, but dang, it would’ve been unpleasant. I should be more careful on roofs in general, I think.
  5. The time I angered a ghost by trying to steal a playing card from a haunted house: This one is genuinely an experience I had that made me believe in ghosts for real, ask me about it sometime, I have a story to tell.
  6. The year I lived in Watson: It is what it is.

4 responses

  1. That one time when we had a lockdown because there was a murderer on our campus who had just committed a homicide and stuffed the bodies in a hollow tree by the BFEC.

  2. Good day! Do you use Twitter? I’d like to follow you if that would be okay.
    I’m undoubtedly enjoying your blog and look forward to new updates.

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