We Tried All the Chilitos Margaritas Flavors So You Don’t Have To


The Mission: Try all of the flavors of margaritas at Chilitos

The Flavors: Lime (original), Strawberry, Raspberry, Peach, Mango, Blueberry

The Judges: Colleen Kemp ‘20 Editor-in-Chief (CK), Kylie Lohrenz ‘20 Daily Editor (KL), Jane Zisman ‘20 Executive Editor (JZ), Lillian Fox Peckos ‘20 Executive Editor (LFP), Sarah Hoffmann ‘20 Editor Emeritus (SH)

*Let it be known that we are all 21+ because the Thrill is not above the law*

What We Know: 4.5 bottles of tequila are in each batch, we do not know how many margs there are in a batch. The batch was in a plastic tub under the bar. Margaritas are $5 on Wednesdays. We love the bartenders, tip them well!

LFP: “Are we including biases in this review?” 

JZ: “Drinker’s choice.”


SH: “I’m not gonna like this because I do not like tequila taste and I’m a baby”

~takes sip~

“Let the record show that I did smirk a little bit.” 

CK: “To contrast that, I DO like the tequila taste.”

SH: “Well some of us went abroad to Spain and some of us did not.”

LFP: “Tequila isn’t from Spain!”

KL: “I’m scared about brain freeze and also I had a bad experience with tequila on my 21st.”

SH: “Very recently I discovered that taking little sips of lime juice is delicious.”

JZ: “You have little bottles of lime juice?”

KL: “This doesn’t taste like lime juice though, this tastes like limeade”

SH: “Yeah! Fake, market lime juice. I’m into it.”

Lime Conclusions: Puckery, refreshing, less sugary and more tequila-y, Sarah sips on lime juice in her spare time, Kylie is not a fan because she’s from Texas and knows better.


LFP: “I have a strong childhood memory of always ordering virgin strawberry margaritas.”

JZ: “So this is going to remind you of childhood?”

~takes sip~

LFP: “It does remind me of childhood, but I could go with more strawberry flavor.”

SH: “I want this to remind me of the lemonade you get at fairs.”

CK: “I’m not expecting to like this because of the seeds and everything.”

LFP: “So you’re anti-seed?”

CK: “Yeah.”

JZ: “Agreed, I’m anti-pulp.”

LFP: “You’re anti-pulp?!”


KL: “You know what the salt tastes like? Did you ever get that sour salt at gas stations as a kid?”

JZ: “Sour salt?”

KL: “Yeah it’s called duck salt, it’s only sold at Sam’s Club”

Strawberry Conclusions: Not the best of the pink drink options, minimal strawberry flavor but still gets the job done. Kylie is a premium Sam’s Club member. We have not come to a consensus about the pulp vs. no pulp argument (stay tuned for a blog off).


LFP: “My expectation is that it’s gonna taste like pina colada”

ALL: “But it’s mango…”

KL: “I have to work on a bibliography after this.”

LFP: “It tastes like an alcoholic hi-chew.”

CK: “That sounds like a good review.”

KL: “You know what’s a flaw in our system right now? We have no palette cleanser.”

JZ: “We need milk. Lillian run to the market.”

SH: “Just like suck your straw a little bit.”

CK: “Sweet, sweet plastic.”

Mango Conclusions: tastes the least like tequila, mango-y after taste, cohesive flavor, hi-chew like, sugary, similar to a smoothie they sell at Wiggin, prettiest color, we downed that bad boy.


CK: “Blueberry is a little rarer than the other flavors”

JZ: “I’m very glad that it is not blue”

SH: “Like car fluid blue? That would have been kinda fun.”

LFP: “No stanky alcohol taste.”

SH: “Tastes like actual blueberry!”

CK: “It tastes like a smoothie.”

LFP:  “This is like a fuckin’ acai bowl. This is the closest thing this campus has to an acai bowl.”

SH: “For the record, Lillian just power posed.”

Blueberry Conclusions: good level of chunky, very hospitable, smooth, acai vibes, may inspire a power pose.


LFP: “I can’t identify a flavor.”

KL: “Describe the color.”

LFP: “It’s a lovely color.”

CK: “If you were going to have a baby shower, this is the color.”

SH: “This is gender reveal pink.”

LFP: “The blueberry was gender ambiguous.” 

JZ: “The blueberry is the most woke.”

SH: “This doesn’t taste like anything.”

Raspberry conclusions: good for gender reveal parties, similar to strawberry in that it lacks intense flavor but still sweet and girly. We’re girls.


LFP: “I kinda like this but it’s also maybe bad punch.”

JZ: “From a scale of Dole peach cup to fresh, good peach plucked from Georgia what would you give it?”

LFP: “Very Dole.”

SH: “Call me by Your Name. How fuckable is each margarita? Wait, can I be gross? This kinda looks like vomit, it’s the chunks and the opacity.”

KL: “I kinda like when the chunks get stuck in the straw and you have to put some work into it. This also tastes like a first-year pregame.”

Peach Conclusions: We want to strain it a little, artificial, tastes like the peach aloe drink you buy in a bodega, visually not our fave.

FINAL RANKING: (Best to Worst) 

  1. Blueberry
  2. Mango
  3. Lime
  4. Raspberry
  5. Strawberry
  6. Peach

“This is the best work I’ve done all year.”

“We gotta down them.”

“We also have to do Where’s It At right now.”

2 responses

  1. Pingback: Where Was It Said: Family Weekend or In Bed? « The Kenyon Thrill

  2. Pingback: The Thrill’s Offical 2020 Presidental Endorsement « The Kenyon Thrill

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