Last chance, dummy!

THE CLOCK IS TICKING MORON!!! IT’S DUE TOMORROW!!

Apply for the Kenyon Thrill and you will do better in your classes, achieve self actualization, and generally be more desirable.

Apply HERE! That’s all you gotta do!

Apply and you can write articles like THIS, where you can lure in more kids to get eaten in the woods :) You’ll float, too!