Shh. Do you smell that? It’s the aroma of pumpkin spice and the dying earth, carried to your nostrils, just for you, by a gentle autumn breeze. IT’S FALL BABY. Wanna know how I know it’s fall? I went APPLE PICKING THIS WEEKEND. Booyah.

My hometown is very American. We’re a farm town, which means a few things. 1) Our town slogan is “a right to farm,” and that slogan is on signage at every possible road entrance to the town. 2) It is highly likely that you will get stuck behind a tractor while driving into “town center.” 3) Town center is basically just three competing farm stands and the one stoplight. This is all to say– my housemates and I decided it was worth our time to make the drive to my hometown for a classic autumnal activity. Only the best for MY bedfellows! It was great. We picked many apples past the reasonable amount of apples for four people to consume (one of whom doesn’t even like apples). We took a self-timer photo in a large wooden cutout of a worm. We saw dozens of Autumnal Christian Girls™ out in the wild– heeled booties, cable-knit sweaters, and all. And of course, we saw him.

How was my weekend?

• High: Gave my puppy a new toy that she loved!!!! For a whole 15 minutes!!!!!! Before she broke it!!!!! Worth it, though. She was so thrilled.
• Low: Our water shut off for like, a few hours this morning, but we treated it like the apocalypse. I bathed in a lake. I’m a dramatic bitch.
• Buffalo: The women in my house are constipated.

How was your weekend?

“I texted my dad ‘I grilled’ and he sent the thumbs up emoji and said ‘what did you grill’ and I said ‘sausages!’ We haven’t spoken since.”

“My low is that I got into a plane crash. My high is that I can walk now. My buffalo is that I looked into the eye of the island.”

“I stress-played with my puppy while I had horrible writer’s block. Shana tova.”

~~A Look Ahead~~

What: Liberty in the Age of Covid-19, a Conversation with Dr. Jack Balkin

Who: Hosted by The Center for the Study of American Democracy and the Department of Political Science

When: September 23rd, 7 pm

Where: Zoom (link coming via email at some point?)