Things I’d Imagine You’d Find in the New Library (Dead or Alive)

A Family of Deer

There are so many deer around Gambier and there’s no way all of them are hiding out in the cornfields. What would make a better refuge for these critters than the expansive maze of scaffolding of a LEED Gold certified sustainable building? Tucked in the depths of the Chalmers Library construction site, deer are sheltered from rusty pick-up trucks barreling down Coshocton Avenue and may even be able to experience the refined taste of natty light.

Peirce Fish

I imagine there is a reservoir containing schools of trout and tilapia dwelling in the ground of the library construction site. I also believe that this is where the fish served at Peirce is found. I mean, Kenyon does say that over 40% of the food they serve is bought locally, and where else would there be fish in Knox County?

An Underground Society

I think that Kenyon in and of itself is its own tight knit society with lots of eerie traditions. How many other schools have their first-years congregate to sing about their founder of 200 years ago spanking naughty freshmen? I’ve also never seen an on-campus cemetery at any other college. What would be more fitting than for Kenyon to have a secret society within its own insular world and what better location than this?

The Ghosts of Olin’s Past

It’s pretty well known that Kenyon is a hotspot for ghosts. Who’s to say that buildings don’t also have their own ghosts once they are demolished? All of Kenyon’s buildings are certainly their own entities. We’ve seen how Peirce periodically lashes out at us causing the front doors to break. Now I personally never knew Olin Library but I definitely feel its presence, and there is almost always a faint aroma of old books and 5-hour Energy as I pass by the construction site.

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