How to Survive Your “Collaborative” Final Project

Okay, so your professor is trying to be ~hip~ and ~non-traditional~ and has assigned a “collaborative” final project. Don’t panic. Even though your grade now hinges on other, likely incompetent, people, you must remember to stay calm. Here are some steps to combat the inevitable feelings of dread, frustration, and anxiety.

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Kenyon Brand Slam Poetry

I’ve heard a lot of slam poetry during my time at Kenyon. Okay, most of the time by accident, when I wandered into an open mic night and it just felt too rude to leave. As my knowledge and experience with this great art form has expanded, I have decided to create my own slam poetry. The best poetry comes from what you know the best, so my slam poetry will emulate the triumphs and tragedies of being a Kenyon student to the best of my ability. If you want to see these poems performed in their truest form, I will be screaming them in the backyard of Chilitos at its busiest hour. Please snap for me!

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10 o’clock list: Multi-level Marketing Schemes that Kenyon Students Would Fall Form

gradschool thrill mlm

Kenyon students are nothing if not scam-able. Our very being here is a big scam. For example, most all of you probably thought that you would have a physical library to study in and a peril-free apartment to live in. But, instead, you got the janky Kenyon we all know and love.

Anyway, I just need thirty minutes of your time to explain these company I’ve been working for. If you take the leap, it has the potential to change your life. NONE of these products will be seen in stores. And lucky you– all you need to participate is a blue Freitag, three years of an American Studies degree under your belt, and roughly a quarter of a million dollars.

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Storytime: I Infiltrated an Anti-Vaxxer Group and Survived

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Yes, the rumors are true. After years of family members and friends designating me “Most Likely to Get Sucked in by a Cult,” I, Jane Rose Griffin, finally admit to being an anti-vaxxer. Haha, just kidding LOL! But in all seriousness, for one magical night this summer, I was able to achieve my childhood dreams of becoming an undercover agent, and at an anti-vaxxer group no less. Spoiler alert: I lived, bitch. 

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10 o’clock list: Ways To Continue Crane Worship Off-campus

It’s that time of the year again. Most of us are leaving campus. Leaving campus means many things, saying farewell to professors, friends, but most importantly it means leaving the sight of the two great deities of campus. Whatever we are doing once we leave there will be many distractions and things which we are tempted to use to fill the whole of the cranes in our hearts. But take heart friends, there are ways to mitigate the heartache and to show the cranes that wherever you are you are thinking of them

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