10 o’clock list: Multi-level Marketing Schemes that Kenyon Students Would Fall Form

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Kenyon students are nothing if not scam-able. Our very being here is a big scam. For example, most all of you probably thought that you would have a physical library to study in and a peril-free apartment to live in. But, instead, you got the janky Kenyon we all know and love.

Anyway, I just need thirty minutes of your time to explain these company I’ve been working for. If you take the leap, it has the potential to change your life. NONE of these products will be seen in stores. And lucky you– all you need to participate is a blue Freitag, three years of an American Studies degree under your belt, and roughly a quarter of a million dollars.

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How To Maintain A Balanced Diet In A Food Oligarchy

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It’s Tuesday, and the weekend of parents is already a distant memory. Those whose parents deigned to show up were treated to a nice reunion and a hearty helping of guilt. Your parents witnessed your lifestyle, and they are disgusted. When’s the last time you ate a vegetable? For the next couple days or so it might be nice to try to make the family proud. And what better way to do so than filling your body with some actual nutrients? So, in a deep haze of shame, I present a guide to healthy eating in Gambier, OH. Continue reading

The Thrill Buries a Time Capsule

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The hour was late and the night was cold. I thrust my digging utensil of choice, the spoon I took from Peirce (but will give back), into the moist earth. 6 feet under I thought to myself, I should be there before break of dawn. I dug until the misty morning air began to creep upon the NCA roof tops, my blistering hands on a mission. The oath of my office paired with the cry of the turkey vultures circling above me rang in my ears: Preserve. Protect. Defend. Bury this time capsule so that Fall 2019 at Kenyon College will live on in infamy.

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A Playlist For People Who Are Insecure About Their Music Taste

Hey, you! Tell me if this describes a situation you’ve ever been in. You’re at someone’s room jamming to some tunes, grooving to the rhythm, and suddenly catastrophe strikes: the phone which was making said music dies. It could happen at any time. And what do you do? You just sit there sheepishly, not willing to subject your personal music library to the judgement of your peers. It’s fine, there’s no need for music. You can just sit here in silence. That will be fine for sure. Continue reading

Blog Off: Fox Peckos ’20 vs. Fallon ’23

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We like to stay pretty competitive here at The Thrill, and a Blog Off is one way we can definitively prove that one of us is objectively a better blogger (dare we say, a better person). So we leave it to you, the reader, to decide in a blind taste test who is really better as we square off on various topics. This time around, we have senior Lillian Fox Peckos ’20 and first-year Sydney Fallon ’23 battling it out RE: Which iteration of the Gambier Deli was better? The Old Deli or New Deli? Who will come out on top? Only you can decide. Continue reading