There’s a dirty rumor being spread by some sorry individuals that because of the current pandemic, Halloween has to be cancelled, or extremely scaled back. If we can’t throw massive ragers or shower the naked bodies’ of strangers in regurgitated fun size Milky Ways then what’s even the point?
Well Halloween ain’t cancelled ’til the Thrill says it’s cancelled. And we’d sooner make peace with pep band.
You have a checked bag, a carry-on, and a personal item for your 2 week break. You’ve overwhelmed the Gambier Coach. You’re hitting every person on the plane as you make your way to your seat. Everyone is upset and your frail body is giving out.
Step two: Stop the problem
You don’t need to pack your parka for spring break. Not even for emergencies. There will be no emergencies. It’s been 80° every day in your warm hometown since February.
I followed these steps back in February and I was determined to keep up my new lifestyle when I returned to campus in March to pack up my room. I thought I was so clever and mature when I only allowed myself to bring home my summertime bare necessities. Now it’s September and I’m starting to get cold. The vermin and pests are catching sweet whiffs from my boxes. I was naive, foolish, overly optimistic; I thought I would be reunited with my precious items in August, but I was so wrong. Here are just a few of the things I left in storage that were a Big Mistake
An 80% full bottle of sriracha
it has a shelf life of two years but I think I forgot to wipe the layer of crust off the tip
Every single pair of jeans I own
I didn’t wear pants once last summer! The only reason I would possibly need jeans is if by some wild coincidence this whole COVID thing doesn’t go away and we cant go back to school… but that seems unlikely hahahahahahahahahaha wow that would be so funny
Every single long sleeve shirt I own
All of my makeup
A bag of pre-cooked lentils
As long as nothing pointy punctures the bag it should be fine. Unfortunately I packed it in the same box as my perfectly pointy utensils.
A moldy fridge
We only had three hours to pack and were in the middle of a national cleaning supplies shortage. I’m not gonna apologize for this one.
The books I forgot to sell back at the end of first semester that I was going to sell back in August
Alright, this one is for the boys. Ladies, we respect your space, but this one is just for the dudes. The real bros out there, you know what I’m talking about. I’m talking cigar-smoking, ice-eating, born-from-the-tailpipe-of-a-Ford-F150-type boys. Fellas, hombres, today we crack the coldest one of all: are people going to laugh at our facial hair?
We like to stay pretty competitive here at The Thrill, and a Blog Off is one way we can definitively prove that one of us is objectively a better blogger (dare we say, a better person). So we leave it to you, the reader, to decide in a blind taste test who is really better as we square off on various topics. This time around, we have sophomore Brooke Brown and first-year Isla Hamblett battling it out RE: Which virtual learning platform is superior? Zoom or Google Meet? Who will come out on top? Only you can decide.