If Every Kenyon Dorm Was a Disney Ride, Here’s What They’d Be

Have you ever been taking a shower in your dorm’s mildewy gender neutral bathroom and thought man, this is just like Splash Mountain? Or maybe been eating your Amish dessert in Peirce and strongly believed that they could upcharge this for $12 at Magic Kingdom? So have we! Here’s what the Kenyon residence halls would be if they were a little bit more magical.

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Owls: The Perfect Avian Metaphor for a College Student

You think owls are smart don’t you. Don’t you. You think they’re ~wise~. Well you’ve been drinking the same strigiforme lobbyist slop that manifested Hedwig and that Winnie-the-Pooh owl who thinks he can read into our public consciousness. But owls haven’t got the processing power of a desktop abacus.

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