10 o’clock List: Rejected Senior Thesis Titles

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Perhaps the most belabored phrase I’ve heard as a Kenyon student is “Writing is rewriting.” Normally this irks me, because it’s true. Because it’s true, that means more work. Womp womp. There is, however, one exception to this phrase — titles. Titles tell your reader everything and nothing at the same time. Slap that bow of a title on top of that gift of a thesis and put it under the tree. A bad title can be sad, but a rose by any other name would smell jjjuuuust as sweet. Despite this, some titles must go. I dug through the annals of Kenyon College Senior Thesis past and found these title rejects. We can only imagine what they prefaced.

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10 o’clock List: Ways I Almost Died at Kenyon

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courtesy of Kenyon’s website

Here’s the thing everyone: sometimes I’m a real dumbass. Like, in terms of Book Smarts and being a Learned Young Man, no, I’m not dumb in that regard. In fact I like to think I’m pretty smart, if it’s all the same. But just in life? Real dullard, every now and then. And the danger about being a fool out there in the world is… well, danger, which I seem to find myself in more times than my parents would be comfortable with, probably. So, that being said, here’s some of the times I nearly died on this campus because I was being stupid:

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10 o’clock List: Kenyon Smells

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Courtesy of: Wikipedia

Whether it be the aroma of your mom’s home cooking, or the calming scent of clothing fresh out of the dryer, there are some smells that just can’t be beat. But out here in good ol’ Gambier, much like the Twilight Zone, the rules don’t apply. In rural Ohio, your nose (and mental strength) are challenged like they have never been before. Here some of the of Kenyon’s many memorable smells:

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10 o’clock List: Party Themes that are Bad According to my Lame Friends

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Look, I know at Kenyon we all like to think of ourselves as ~creative types~ but here’s the thing–I really am. I’m bursting with ideas for parties that are Hip and Cool and not the normal, played out, ho-hum shindigs you see every other weekend. It’s like yeah, we get it, this party is 90’s themed, fucking great, Ryan.

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10 o’clock List: How to Not Lose the Deli Again

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The Gambier Deli is back in action, baby, and we all know what that means. We’ve got eggs. We’ve got some hot sammies. We’ve got that nice bearded man who works/lives there, and yesterday when I was treating myself to brunch he saw me and said, “Hey buddy, long time, how’s it going?” and I felt truly validated for the first time in my life.

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