I don’t know about y’all, but it feels like Kenyon is missing something. Maybe it’s the lack of unfinished NCA basements, graveyard battles of the bands, and satanic ska cults, but I think we can all agree that Gambier is getting a little too fucking soft. I mean, wouldn’t you rather incur serious brain damage from a Horn mosh pit rather than a silly game of rugby? Why don’t we have a task force about that, huh? Anyways, I figured I’d do my part in roughing up our image by showing just how edgy our admins and alumni could be if they committed to the sick bit.
It’s 4:30 am, and I wake up from a nightmare in a cold sweat, covered in a pile of Cheez-It crumbs. I scramble for my phone, my hands shaking as I wipe the tears from my bloodshot eyes. My roommate shakes her head and rolls back to the other side of the bed. “God, not again. Go to bed. He’s not real.” I do not answer. I am rendered speechless by the image of my tormentor, the man who haunts my nightmares: Josh Radnor.
Ever since digital artist Trevor Paglen uploaded his ImageNet Roulette project to the web, I’ve been obsessed. I’ve spent hours furiously uploading photos to be compared with the database and anxiously waiting for my new identity to be spit out. Am I a nonsmoker? A fighter pilot? A colleen? I hunger to know. I haven’t been able to sleep for weeks. My friends are getting worried. Deadlines have come and gone, but all I can do is give the beast what it wants. The only thing that could save me from the grips of this illness would be to happen upon an image able to expose our true reality and pull the wool from my tired eyes. And, don’t get too excited, but I think I’ve done it. I turned to the classic Kenyon figures that we know and love and, although some still miss the mark, there’s one label that matches so perfectly that I can finally end my search in success. Read on for some identifications I happened upon along the way and one that is so true and pure that it may alter life at Kenyon forevermore.
I would say that I am the Thrill’s resident Alumni Stalker. I Facebook messaged John Green for months on end (always being left on read) and I have Josh Radnor’s tweets on alert. Once he even directly responded to me! To cut to the chase, I don’t know if most normal people know this, but Josh Radnor has a band. Yes, you heard me correctly. He and a pal write three to four minute songs with titles like “It’s Yours Once You Give it Away” and “Still Though We Should Dance”.
You know when that kid from your high school tries to become a SoundCloud rapper and you’re like, haha, thank goodness we weren’t friends and thus I can’t be associated with him? This is like that, except you chose this. You chose to be grouped with the man who willingly made this video: Continue reading
Hello my fellow birthday-havers! I hope you had a good Thanksgiving break and ate lots of turkey! Gobble gobble, am I right? But now we’re into the final stretch of the semester and and what’s that, you need something to watch/read/consume once finals are over? Well go ahead and bookmark this, baby, because oh do I have some content for you.
With graduation two weeks away, seniors are preparing to say goodbye to the Hill and their time here. Some may be counting down the days with excitement, others with deep existential dread. Above all, these weeks bring a time of reflection on the memories made in their four years. What comes to mind are big moments like First-Year Sing or Senior Soirée, but there are also little moments and details of Kenyon that go unnoticed only until one leaves the Hill. There are smells, sounds, and feelings that don’t exist outside of Kenyon, but it’s hard to put those into words while we’re still here. So, we asked alumni to think deep back into the pockets of their memory and share with us their small moments of nostalgia. The things they didn’t expect to miss about Kenyon, but found themselves longing for anyway. Hopefully, for us still here, we can take a moment to realize these taken for granted aspects and relish them while we can. Below are responses from Alumni.
While Kenyon’s proud of all our alumni’s accomplishments, sometimes it’s easy to forget that success isn’t always measured in book deals or starring roles in mediocre PBS miniseries. Plenty of grads are up to interesting things in the real world without getting notable mentions. To rectify that, I talked with Brendan O’Connor ’12 about journalism, the liberal arts, and Ben & Jerry’s.