10 o’clock list: Viable Alternative Career Options

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Graduation is closer than you think, and you’re probably wondering–how does one GET a job after a four year stint at a liberal arts school? You could go down to the CDO and get some pamphlets and have meaningful conversations with the people trained to help you with just that, OR alternatively, you could give into the feeling of existential dread and pick one of the unique options we’ve listed below that are guaranteed to get you some fast cash to pay off those student loans you totally forgot you were going to have.

1. Become a Sugar Baby. This will probably involve sending a creepy old man sensual photos of your feet or something but it’ll totally be worth the insane amounts of money that rich perverted old men seem to have. Easiest way to go about this? Set your tinder preference to ages 65+ and let the gentlemen callers come to you.

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