I Drank Out of Bowls For Three Days and Sorry I’m Enlightened Now (But Not Really)

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photo cred: Mollie Greenberg, who would like to say “I think you could associate me with liquids”

Look around you. The world is two big bowls pressed together with a cranberry vinaigrette salad in the middle. Your head is a bowl for the squishy computer we call the brain. Your hands are just flexi-bowls. Eyes? Bowls. Your heart is a bowl for the slippery blood which breaths emotion and heartburn into you. Bowls, even, are fashion (see below).

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10 o’ clock List: Unsolicited advice from your mother, or unsolicited advice you give your mother?

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Parents weekend is truly a time. A moment in time. A collection of moments in time which we call collectively a weekend. What a nice invention that humans made. They made the week and then they said, heck, we have this dangling clump of time like a juicy juicy Golden Delicious and we gotta do something with it, heck, or else nothing will be done with it. Someone said we can call it the end! And everyone agreed that was a terrible idea. But because the guy who suggested that was just so very pathetic everyone decided to squish the week and the end together and call it a weekendWhat should we do with it? a voice rose from the crowd. In a peal of genius, somebody responded nothing. A wave of spearmint feeling fell over the universe.

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Kenyon Zodiac: Content from Kenyon Alums

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Hello my fellow birthday-havers! I hope you had a good Thanksgiving break and ate lots of turkey! Gobble gobble, am I right? But now we’re into the final stretch of the semester and and what’s that, you need something to watch/read/consume once finals are over? Well go ahead and bookmark this, baby, because oh do I have some content for you.
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PSA: Mercury is Retrograde

Help.

Help.

Hello Darkness my old friend, Mercury Retrograde we meet again. On September 17, Mercury officially went retrograde again which means your life is going to be jumbled until October 9. Some of you may not believe in the retrograde, but those of us who know the truth understand that these next few weeks are going to be weird on the Hill. Wondering how to escape Mercury’s walk of shame? Here’s your Mercury Retrograde survival guide.

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