Ever heard of T. S. Eliot? Of course you have, because you go to Kenyon College where–along with the pineapple–literature, and poetry, are main ingredients in the sweet and sour chicken. And being the big fan of T. S, Eliot that you are, the way you find your true bliss is when you reflect on his work: Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats turned into Andrew Lloyd Webber’s 1981, Cats the musical, adapted into a direct-to video film in 1998, adapted into Tom Hopper’s 2019 feature film, turned into this article: Kenyon Kats Edits.

We brought you punk Kenyon, so it was only a matter of time we did something not nearly as good. Here is what some of our admins and alumni would look like if they starred in the age-old classic Kats.