Look, I’m not stupid. I just feel like I am only getting dumber with every passing day. I don’t know if it’s the ultimately crushing feeling I get when a possible employer asks me why I didn’t study marketing, or if it’s my inability to just sit down and write a paper like I used to– but it’s something.Continue reading
We might be waiting for the billionaire overlord(s) who run this campus to listen to us, BUT:
~~* THE WAIT TO APPLY TO THE THRILL IS OVER *~~
Here at the Thrill, we love breaking the rules. Perhaps you read our feature on the library after dark. At least, you know that the ethos of this publication is rebellion, whether we like to accept it or not. I have never broken a rule in the name of the Thrill, but I know that accounts of my poor choices will always be welcomed here.
Today, my guys, this all changes. I am here to tell you the story of me breaking into a fenced in modular unit and hotboxing the shit out of one of its study rooms.
You’ve been pounding water all day. You have a plan of how to get from your 11:10 class to the real action fast. You finished your work so you could start drinking early afternoon, at the latest. You’re probably going to not remember 7:30 on because you’re still a dumb freshman. That’s right: it’s Sendoff time. We asked our lowly little first years what they expected from Sendoff, and here they are for your viewing pleasure.
The Housing Lottery has been the talk of the town for the last few weeks. An all-out bloodbath in the name of getting a south campus single, or an NCA with your friends, or even just a single in Mather, as long as you aren’t on the first floor. While I am a first year and had my rooming situation in place previously (thank you, sweet, sweet Zeta division housing), I am trying to feel empathic for those who have no options but to buddy up to a roommate-less friend of a friend in hopes of not getting the absolute worst possible option.
Relive that joyous day here. For those poor first years who did not get to experience Gourdzilla, just know that she reigned as the Autumnal Queen of Kenyon for one brief, glorious month. She was also The Thrill’s first big news story, and an instrumental part of getting this blog on its feet. Gourdzilla, we salute you.
An archive of our Gourdzilla coverage.