Freak Things I’ve Heard In The Common Room At 3 A.M

You know the scene: It’s a Saturday night. You and your friends have just finished gorging on some Dominos cheesy bread after a night of hitting up a random all-campus followed by some NCA-hopping. You and your friend are the last two survivors at 3 AM when everyone’s gone to sleep, hiding out in the common room as both of your roommates are asleep. It is my theory the  deepest of conversations happen past midnight, but that’s kind of hard to accomplish when so many weird beings pass through the common room in a drunken stupor. Here are some freaky things I’ve overheard or seen in the common room at 3 AM.

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Domino’s Knows I Need A Ride: The Final Time

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I did not ride in this fancy car, it was probably a Prius or something, I don’t know for sure.


And we’re back, folks. This is the last time (I promise) that I will tell this story, the story of my travels as a weary first year from South Campus to the lovely Lewis or Norton parking lot.

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A Wild Ride: Domino’s Driver Turned Uber for A Night

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The Domino’s man looked lonely.

The night of PEEPs Halloween, I made my way out of Old Kenyon and through the crowd of smoke and people into the mostly empty parking lot beside the building. I was still a little bit disoriented, my ears were ringing and my glasses were still fogged a bit, and in my efforts to try and find the direction of Middle Path from the back of Old K, I saw the glow of the Domino’s sign on top of a delivery car. I went up to the pizza guy, and I made sure that he wasn’t white. If he was, I would’ve completely abandoned this idea, but he wasn’t, so I soldiered on.

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10 o’clock list: How to Bring Kenyon Back to Your Hometown

10 o’clock list: How to Bring Kenyon Back to Your Hometown

It’s time to face the facts: we only have five days left in the semester at this place we’ve called “home” for the past couple of months. I for one am excited about returning to my place of birth, but here are some tips for those of you about to experience culture shock after Kenyon kicks us out. Continue reading