Kenyon-Brand Perfumes and Colognes

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Courtesy of Ryan Mizard/Instagram/Daily Mail

You know what stinks? The election. Bet you didn’t see that one coming.

You know what else stinks? Me, because I’ve been too depressed to shower. Bet you didn’t see that one coming–seriously, I bet you guys couldn’t even tell. All because I’ve been disguising my B.O. with the potent power of Kenyon Scent Perfumes and Colognes of the Kokoscent Kollection. Check out these bad boys to drown your sorrows–and your senses!

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Down the Ballot Voting: A Thing You Can Do If You Want To

screen-shot-2016-11-06-at-9You know that mom who in your neighborhood that you try at all costs to avoid, but she power-walks with little pink dumbbells up to your window when you’re backing out of the driveway to remind you to remind your mother to vote for the next chair of the Homeowners Association?

I am her, only instead little pink dumbbells, I’m doubling-fisting cups of coffee, and instead of being concerned about your mother’s enfranchisement in the Cul-de-sac of Broken Dreams you live in, I’m concerned about you being a proper soldier of democracy in the United States of America.

Too dramatic? Too bad.

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The Monday Catchup

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The Market has some gems

You may have noticed that I’m wearing all-black today. I’m in mourning. Frankly, I’m rather disappointed that you aren’t in all-black as well. What did I lose? I think a better question is, what did we lose? We lost an extra hour of sweet light- “fall back” or something. We gained an hour of sleep, but that means nothing. Less vitamin D = extra sad me. But, for just 75¢ a day you can help get me overcome my melancholy. Dial the number at the bottom of your screen to make a donation. By simply calling 1-800-MIA-NEEDS-A-REALITY-CHECK you can save a life. Why wait? Be among the first 90 callers, and we’ll send you a free tote bag with a picture of the child you’re saving (i.e me).

I’m partly in mourning for you, too. Your weekend sounded eventful. Here’s what you had to say.

“Did I do a Bikram Yoga class? Just kidding I was just STUCK in the front row for Motown”

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Martha Raddatz P’15 on The Daily Show

Screengrab from dailyshow.com.

With all the election excitement this week, you might have missed this appearance by Martha Raddatz, ABC senior foreign affairs correspondent and a Kenyon parent, on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart on Monday night. Raddatz was the breakout star of October’s vice-presidential debate, which she moderated to widespread praise, and she spoke to a packed Rosse Hall just a few weeks ago. In this interview, Stewart asks Raddatz about her approach to the debate, her plans for Election Night and her work as a foreign correspondent. Sadly, no mention of Kenyon or the Lords.

Breaking: Vice President Biden to Campaign in Gambier on Tuesday, Oct. 30, According to Release

(Andrew Cutraro via Wikimedia Commons)

Details are vague, but according to a press release published this afternoon (included after the jump), Vice President Joe Biden will make a campaign stop in Gambier on Tuesday, Oct. 30 for a “grassroots” event. Biden will also pay a visit to Wooster, Ohio.

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